Sunday Morning WTF?! Communiqué From The Commissioner's Office

Baseball is indeed an international game!

We are proud to announce Ricardo "Pop" Livernois of Leon, Mexico, earned his first-ever Regular Season Championship in the Santa Lechuga Power League this season. This is good news in Mexico, which is celebrating its first infusion of non-drug revenue from the United States in at least a decade. Upon hearing the news, masked agents from several cartels shot up an elementary school.

Splitting the big honors with Pop was Jim "Licko" Klinhamer of Tres Caballeros, who is this year's grand champion. What makes Licko's win all the more impressive is that he is even participating in gambling-type activities, given that he almost got arrested in Las Vegas for grabbing a betting slip out of a pit boss' hand while arguing on behalf of a guy he didn’t even know. When told about Jim's big win, Martin from Spaghetti Warehouse said, "Big deal. I would have done better than Jim picking a team blindfolded!"

Congrats to Pop, Licko and all our 2010 champs.

By the way, in case the news hasn't spread beyond Northern California yet, the San Francisco Giants won the World Series this year. The San Francisco Giants! Imagine that. The Giants haven't won the series title since Eisenhower, though it felt like Polk.

The people of San Francisco are so giddy about the outcome of the series that they actually cheered Steve Perry. The Giants did it with a slap-happy dash of beards, thongs, freaks, geeks, pot smokers, a Deadhead backup catcher, guys rescued from MBL's scrap heap, The Machine and a manager with a head with the density of a bowling ball. All in all, they closely resemble the Santa Lechuga Power League ownership group.

Thanks to all SLPL owners for another terrific year. And thanks especially to the owners who are paid up. For the losers, remember that there's always next year!

Rube Furrow
Commissioner

Playoffs: At-A-Glance | Overall | Playoffs | Hitting Stats | Pitching Stats | Team Stats | HOF | Past Leaders
Final Regular Season: At-A-Glance | Overall | Division | Hitting | Pitching | All-Star
Pay Already!
PayPal

The Bobblehead Bobbles for Joe Livernois, Vince Livernois & All Owners Who Have Birthdays During The Long Offseason

Today, the Bobblehead-of-Lettuce bobbles for Joe Livernois, owner of Bobs of Death and our league’s founder, who is celebrating a birthday today:

Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble!


In addition, the Bobblehead-of-Lettuce bobbles for Joe’s brother Vince Livernois, owner of Los Vatos Suaves and our very first Overall Champ (2000), who is also celebrating a birthday today:

Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble!


Finally, the Bobblehead-of-Lettuce bobbles for all our owners who have birthdays during the offseason and who never get to have the Bobblehead-of-Lettuce bobble for them because they have birthdays during the offseason:

Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble! Bobble!


Happy Birthday to Joe, Vince and all owners who have birthdays during the offseason!!!

Playoffs: At-A-Glance | Overall | Playoffs | Hitting Stats | Pitching Stats | Team Stats | HOF | Past Leaders
Final Regular Season: At-A-Glance | Overall | Division | Hitting | Pitching | All-Star
Pay Already!
PayPal

Sparky's Dead. C’est la vie. Wait. That's Not Right.

George Lee "Sparky" Anderson is dead. As is the wont of too many Hall-of-Famers in the Phil Rizzuto Memorial Hall-of-Fame Death Pool , the old boy waited until after the season ended before keeling over, thereby depriving us of Death Pool points. Had he died just a few days earlier, while the World Series was still going on, my Pepino Monos and Jim Klinkhamer’s Tres Caballeros would have received his points. Instead, a wasted HOF death. Sheesh.

For those who are interested, had he died while the season was still going, Sparky’s death would have netted me a total of 120 points and Jim would have received 145 points. Remember, Death Pool points are earned by subtracting the reported age of the dirt-napper at the time of his death (rounded down to the most-recent birthday) from 100 and multiplying the result by 5. So, Sparky’s age of 76 would net 100-76=24*5=120 points. After that, you apply the Magic Number. Since Jim’s Magic Number of 24 was closer than my number of 21, Jim would have earned an additional 25 points. It’s moot now, but Jim’s 145 points would have been enough for him to overtake Bobs of Death owner Joe Livernois to win this season’s Death Pool. C’est la vie. Er ... I mean, c’est la mort.

Playoffs: At-A-Glance | Overall | Playoffs | Hitting Stats | Pitching Stats | Team Stats | HOF | Past Leaders
Final Regular Season: At-A-Glance | Overall | Division | Hitting | Pitching | All-Star
Pay Already!
PayPal

Pay Already Or The Dog And Bird Get It

Commissioner Rube Furrow is coming out of his San Francisco Giants bender much faster than anyone believed he would (or maybe he's just taking a break) ... and now he's all up in my face because I haven't gotten everyone to pay already. "We're only $635 short," I told him. "Yeah, well," he responded, "$635 short means that we're not going to be able to pay one of our big winners or a bunch of our lesser winners.” I retorted with nothing because, well, his math is right. So now he's threatening to kill my dog, eat my bird, and blast Perry Cuomo music over loudspeakers in the direction of my bedroom window until everyone pays.

Look, I understand that my dog Fred, my bird Garth, and my rapid-eye movements don't mean a singly solitary thing to you, but I treasure the hell out of all three of those things. So do me a favor and pay your ownership and/or trade fees already. Go here to see what you owe. (If you have already paid or even just recently sent a check, drop me a line to give me the details. I'll update the table appropriately.)

To pay your ownership and/or trade fees, make my life easier, and allow all our league champs to collect their winnings, send your check to:

Joe Livernois
459 Echo Valley Road
Salinas, CA 93907

If it's more convenient, you can pay your derelict debt on PayPal here. You'll have to pay a little more, but PayPal is hella convenient.

Thanks in advance. I appreciate it, as do Fred, Garth, and my future sleep patterns.

Playoffs: At-A-Glance | Overall | Playoffs | Hitting Stats | Pitching Stats | Team Stats | HOF | Past Leaders
Final Regular Season: At-A-Glance | Overall | Division | Hitting | Pitching | All-Star
Pay Already!
PayPal

Yesterday's Heroes: Those Who Paid

While we twiddle our thumbs waiting for Commissioner Rube Furrow to give us his big end-of-season-recap -- which, frankly, may or may not come since he’s a big San Francisco Giants fan and is fully headlong into what some are reporting may be a year-long bender -- we thought we’d report on yesterday’s league heroes: those who paid. Responding to our e-mail announcing the winners and reminding everyone to pay, the following very cool, very awesome, most perfect owners dropped their due funds into our kitty so that Rube can, once he’s recovered from his bender, actually pay the winners:
. Julie Pankoke, Bauer's Bandits
. Aaron Pankoke, The Strokes
. Joe Kelley, Somali Pirates
. Suzie Rochellle, Who, What & I Don't Know
. Marcus Rochellle, B.O.S.S.
. David Edison, Cameltowing, Inc.
. Steve McNelley, Guzzlyn Suds
. Dan Klinkhamer, AARPs
. Kevin Klinkhamer, Dongwhipped
. Sue Klinkhamer, Jim Bunning Is Dead to Me

Remember, you can check Who Owes What to see if you owe and how much you owe. (If you have already paid and we haven't noted it, please let us know.) Send your check to:

Joe Livernois
459 Echo Valley Road
Salinas, CA 93907

You can also pay your derelict debt using PayPal. It costs a little more but it’s mega-convenient and fast.

BTW, if you’re a winner, drop us a note and let us know the address where you want us to send your check. Use this handy-dandy form to give us your address, okay?

Playoffs: At-A-Glance | Overall | Playoffs | Hitting Stats | Pitching Stats | Team Stats | HOF | Past Leaders
Final Regular Season: At-A-Glance | Overall | Division | Hitting | Pitching | All-Star
Pay Already!
PayPal

slpl_bobblehead_bobble


twitstamp.com

free hit counters
views

Send Us An E-Mail

Copyright ©2010 by Joe Livernois & Tony Livernois